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Golf Quotes
Quotes of the Day
Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behaviour not otherwise excusable
I don’t fear death, but I sure don’t like those three-footers for par
The golf ball has no sense at all, which is why it has to be given stern lectures constantly, especially during the act of putting.
You know you’re on the Senior Tour when your back goes out more than you do
He who has the fastest golf cart never has a bad lie.

funny golf quotes

  • The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows.
    By P G Wodehouse
    Views: 431

    The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

    Tags: butterflies, funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfers, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, meadows, upset
  • A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents' luck
    By Anonymous
    Views: 372

    A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents’ luck

    Tags: funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, luck, opponents, skill
  • My psychiatrist prescribed a game of golf as an antidote to the feelings of euphoria I experience from time to time
    By Bruce Lansky
    Views: 415

    My psychiatrist prescribed a game of golf as an antidote to the feelings of euphoria I experience from time to time.

    Tags: euphoria, funny golf quotes, game of golf, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, pyschiatrist
  • I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine
    By Bruce Lansky
    Views: 450

    I’ll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine.

    Tags: back nine, beers, break 90, funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes
  • We learn so many things from golf: how to suffer, for instance.
    By Bruce Lansky
    Views: 530

    We learn so many things from golf: how to suffer, for instance.

    Tags: funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, learn, suffer
  • I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.
    By Gerald Ford
    Views: 486

    I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.

    Tags: allegations, eagle, elk, funny golf quotes, golf, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, moose
  • Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.
    By Henry Beard
    Views: 361

    Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks – No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard’s excellent Tennis for Beginners.

    Tags: beginners, duffers, funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, shanks, tennis
  • Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective
    By Huxtable Pippey
    Views: 499

    Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective.

    Tags: Caddies, driver, funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, provocation, sand wedge
  • Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad.
    By A A Milne
    Views: 459

    Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad.

    Tags: bad golf, funny golf quotes, golf, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes, popular
  • He who has the fastest golf cart never has a bad lie.“
    By Mickey Mantle
    Views: 438

    He who has the fastest golf cart never has a bad lie.

    Tags: bad lie, cheating, funny golf quotes, golf, golf cart, Golf Life, golfingquotes, golfquotes, great golf quotes
Previous567Next
  • Popular
  • Recent
  • Golf is a matter of confidence. If you think you cannot do it, there is no chance you will
    23 May 2024
  • If your Driver is hot, your Putter will be ice cold; If you can hit your Irons, you will top your Woods; If you are keeping your Right Elbow tucked in, your Head will come up.
    9 August 2024
  • Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn't float too well
    Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn’t float too well
    8 September 2022
  • You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
    You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
    4 October 2022
  • If your Driver is hot, your Putter will be ice cold; If you can hit your Irons, you will top your Woods; If you are keeping your Right Elbow tucked in, your Head will come up.
    9 August 2024
  • Tyrell Hatton funny golf quote
    With it being harder a lot of guys sort of losing their head, it sort of brings them to my level because I just lose my head every week. They can experience what it’s like in my head for a week.
    16 June 2024
  • If there’s a storm rolling in, you’ll be having the game of your life.
    23 May 2024
  • Golf is a matter of confidence. If you think you cannot do it, there is no chance you will
    23 May 2024

Latest Price Drops

1
The Best of Harvey Penick
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The Best of Harvey Penick
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OFF
£610.99
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2
Gary Player: To Be The Best
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Gary Player: To Be The Best
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£3.69 ▼£95.55
3
Thanks for the Game: The Best of Golf with Henry Cotton
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Thanks for the Game: The Best of Golf with Henry Cotton
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£126.99
£4.98 ▼£122.01
4
Byron Nelson's Winning Golf
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Byron Nelson's Winning Golf
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5
The Secret of Golf: The Story of Tom Watson and Jack Nicklaus
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The Secret of Golf: The Story of Tom Watson and Jack Nicklaus
86%
OFF
£13.48
£1.98 ▼£11.50

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Popular Quotes

On the Old Course at St. Andrews: This is the origin of the game, golf in its purest form, and it’s still played that way on a course seemingly untouched by time.
Grip the club as if you were holding a baby bird
Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result.
Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.
I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone’s golf game. It’s called an eraser.
Putting is like wisdom – partly a natural gift and partly the accumulation of experience
If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball
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